Closer to You
by Kenzie493
Summary: [ep 25 alt. universe] Hikari has liked Touji for AGES, but has never told him! Can a series of fights force her to say I LOVE YOU! or will they force them apart? READ THE LATEST CHAPTER NOW! V. IMPORTANT!
1. Love?

**YOU MUST READ THE FOLLOWING NOTE! DO **NOT** SKIP! IMPORTANT! **

OOOOOkay! How exciting! After SUCH a long wait I am FINALLY releasing the sequal to Pushing the Limits of Our Friendship (or PtLoOF, as some of you may know it)! I know you were all expecting there to be another bonus chapter for PtLoOF, but I just couldn't do it. I don't really know WHY, I just couldn't bring myself to write another. However, there is always the offchance that I'll write another so don't be surprised if in a few months or something you see another chapter!

BIG NOTE: To those of you who are first timers to this story/universe thing I've got going, it is NOT AT ALL REQUIRED that you read PtLoOF! This story can stand by itself, though I am definitely going to encourage you to read the other story. If you want to, it's a SxA story, but if you don't want to, the explanation of what happened in that one is written into this chapter for you so you don't need to read it. For that matter, if you want to read PtLoOF, don't look down at the story because it'll give it away! ALSO, This takes place in the alternate universe shown in episode 25. If you havent even SEEN that episode, you can still read this story without feeling like it was spoiled at all.

Another note: Previously, my chapters weren't seperated into scenes. It never caused any confusion (that I know of) but the reason for that was that ffnet got rid of my separators. SO, I have a phrase I'm gonna use to seperate sections "...Fades out to black...Fades in... ". It's a little dumb but I didn't want there to be the potential for unnessecary confusion! In one of my Naruto stories (read it if you're into that!) the seperations were really important and when they dissapeared in the final copy it was hard to understand.

Ummm...I'd like to say for the record that at some point in this story, one of the chasracters says "Ohayo" at night or something, unless this is the version in which I edited it out (I have like, 5 copies of this!). The correct term would be "Konnichiwa" or something since Ohayo means good morning. My native language is english and all I know of japanese is from anime so I don't nessecarily have the best grasp on that language. Further, the names, if sticking to Japan's custom, would be in the opposite order of how I use it (I think) which is the american version. I apologize to anyone who gets annoyed by that. I know I myself do get annoyed by that on occasion, so I sympathize!

BTW, Thank you to everyone who favorited PtLoOF and Other Peoples Thoughts, PtLoOF, and also to those of you who put me on alerts! What a great confidence booster, ne? Just so you guys know, there WILL be an Other Peoples Thoughts, CTY, so look forward to that. The sections are much longer (though it takes a few chapters for me to really warm up) and better written too.

Italics are thoughts. Bold is stressed words. Bold italics is stressed thoughts! And brackets are instant messages. Well, I've said all that I needed to, except for "Please enjoy", "Review" and "Thanks for reading"!

**CHAPTER 1:**

**"…You're in love?"**

"And then, he kissed me!" Asuka squealed delightedly. Hikari gasped and shot up from the low cement wall they were sitting on.

"He did? WOW! I didn't know Shinji was so bold! Congratulations for you, Asuka!" Hikari said happily. Asuka got up and took her wrists.

"He's a really good kisser, too!" she whispered conspiratorially. "It was…for lack of a better word, magical!" she straightened up. "I have no clue how he became such a fantastic kisser…was he with anyone when I was in Germany…? If he was…ARGH!" Asuka yelled.

Hikari grinned. "No, he didn't date anyone. How old were you then, eight?" she laughed. "No, you're lucky. Your…boyfriend?…is a naturally good kisser! Most girls can only hope that practice really does make perfect!"

Asuka smiled. "That's good." She said sincerely. At that moment, Shinji walked up to the pair, awkwardly rubbing the back of his neck.

"Um…ah, good morning, Hikari." He said. Hikari grinned.

"Hi, Shinji." There was a short silence. Asuka waited for Shinji to look at her before latching onto his arm and kissing his cheek. Shinji blushed.

"Shinji and I are going to go over there, Hikari!" Asuka said happily, pointing to a cherry blossom tree with long branches. Hikari grinned, knowing exactly what Asuka was planning.

"Hai. See you two later!" Hikari strolled off in the opposite direction of the couple. She walked back to the front of the school.

"I can't believe it took Asuka only a _day_ after she realized she liked Shinji to ask him out!" she whispered in disbelief. "I've known that I like Touji for years and nothing has gotten any better! Even if Shinji did say he liked me! It was probably one of Kensuke's jokes that made Shinji think he felt anything for me!" Kensuke was always teasing Touji about Hikari. It was _definitely_ plausible that Shinji had gotten the wrong idea.

Hikari walked towards an obviously gossiping Kensuke and Touji. "G'morning." She interrupted. Kensuke had a huge grin on his face, but Touji jumped at the sound of her voice.

"Did Asuka tell you the whole story?" Kensuke begged. "Shinji mumbled some information to us, but it was so garbled that my camera didn't get a very good audio recording!" he sighed with disappointment and turned on the camera and pointed it at Hikari.

"Yeah, she told me everything that mattered." Hikari responded with a wave of her hand.

"Well?" Touji asked. She turned to look at him with exhausted eyes. _It's going to take me forever, isn't it?_

"Well, after we left they did homework for awhile. Then they were going to go to bed, but there were no sleeping bags so they shared Shinji's bed." Hikari said, in a tone that clearly indicated she was morally against such things. Touji and Kensuke gasped loudly.

"Wow!" Touji stretched the word out in a high voice as was his fashion. Hikari dropped her dismissive façade and grinned a bit.

"Tell us more!" Kensuke asked desperately. Hikari complied.

"Shinji had some sort of perverted dream about Asuka while laying on her." She said, thinking how scandalous it all was. The boys laughed in response. Hikari's smile grew and she hurried back to the story before they could say anything. "She didn't tell him she knew he was dreaming about her, so neither can you!" she ordered. "She asked him if he thought she was pretty. He said yes." Hikari finished with a wistful sigh. The boys raised their eyebrows skeptically.

"Shinji wouldn't say that." Touji said slowly.

"Well, it took him forever to, but Asuka eventually got him to respond. And then—this is the big part—she asked if she was dateable! That girl's so daring!" Hikari exclaimed. "Shinji avoided the question for awhile before saying that Asuka was."

"So? That's all? And they're dating now?" Kensuke wondered aloud.

Hikari shrugged regally. "No. I wasn't finished." Hikari patted down her skirt. "She asked him if he would date her. He said yes, so Asuka asked him to…date her, I guess." She sighed again. "It's so romantic! I'm really jealous!"

"Jealous…?" Touji asked tentatively after a moment. Hikari turned to Touji and stared into his eyes pointedly.

"Incredibly jealous, yes." Her voice was heavy with meaning. She could sense Kensuke's grin at getting this on camera. Touji anxiously shifted his weight from one foot to the other.

"Why? Did you want to date Shinji?" Touji asked with a frown.

Hikari hit his arm hard while Kensuke snickered joyfully. "NO! No, baka-Touji! I just want _someone_ to…"she sighed hopelessly. "…like me. To want me back!" she frowned angrily.

"Wait! You like someone?" Touji hissed at her.

"Of course I do! Do_ you_?" she hissed back.

He grimaced. "Yeah, but…"

"Well, then, am I not allowed to like anyone?" she yelled at him.

"N-no!" Touji said abruptly. "No you're not!" all three were shocked.

After a long, tense silence Kensuke spoke quietly. "I'm so glad I taped this!"

Touji bonked him on the head with an aggravated frown, then stalked off. Hikari and Kensuke watched his back for a moment. Hikari hit Kensuke before walking off in the opposite direction herself.

_**...Fades out to black...Fades in... **_

School was tedious. Hikari felt like a ton of bricks was resting on her head, and her thoughts varied from flinging one of the metaphorical bricks at Touji and just letting herself drift off. Her head just felt **so heavy**. Her _heart_ even felt **so heavy**! And it wasn't even lunch yet!

_I can't believe he actually said that! If he's allowed to like some girl, why aren't I allowed to like anyone? What would Touji think if he knew it was HIM I liked?_ Hikari sighed hopelessly. _What to do? What can I do about this? I'm NOT about to apologize, seeing as I obviously am not the slightest bit to blame!_

She turned a bit in her desk in the front of the class to look at him. Hikari was surprised to find Touji staring right at her with his arms crossed, apparently deep in thought. He jerked a bit after a moment, colored, and looked out the window. Hikari slowly turned back to her laptop.

_Maybe he's thinking of saying sorry? Oh, I hope so! I don't want to eat lunch alone today! I know I can't sit with Asuka or Shinji, that'd be weird, and Kensuke will sit with Touji, and I'll be stuck alone, or tagging along with some of the others._ She frowned._ I could always sit with Ayanami. But that might be weird, too. Hmm…_

Hikari? Appeared on her screen. She turned around again to look for the sender. Touji lifted his hand a few inches off the desk and gave her a small wave. She turned back to the front and bit her lip anxiously.

Yes?

Are you really mad at me?

Hikari paused. She was, wasn't she? But… Not so mad, no. Just irritated.

She faintly heard a relieved sigh from the back of the classroom. Good. I didn't mean to insult you…

Yeah? What DID you mean, then?

Touji was very slow in responding. It seemed wrong for you to like someone e was his answer. The lone 'e' was confusing, but Hikari put it away as a simple mistake for now, deciding that she could mull it over later. She quickly saved the conversation for future reference.

Then, what he had written sunk in. Do you think I'm incapable of liking someone? she sent, glaring at the screen.

She could imagine Touji spluttering if she said it to him, stumbling over a quick answer. Hikari could see his hopeful face, fearing that he may have responded incorrectly, anticipating either a blow or a pat on the head.

NO! Stop jumping to conclusions and twisting my words! Popped up almost immediately. It's just impossible for me to think that you might have a crush on someone! It doesn't seem to fit. I can't place it with my idea of you. She received a short while later.

She seethed. It's not a crush! I might even love him! I don't know!

…You're in love? The reply, which Hikari believed would be said in a soft, quiet voice, appeared.

I said I don't know! And how does it not fit? Liking him is such an important part of me!

A pause. I never see you fawning over ANYONE. How could you almost love this guy? Who is he, anyway? Touji pestered.

Not saying. A moment later, she heard an aggravated groan.

Fine, don't tell me. He messaged Hikari. I think it's because you don't openly (I suppose?) admire him that I can't imagine it. I've always thought that maybe you…had a secret crush or something. She considered it for a moment, which Touji took as confusion and continued. A long time ago, we all used to think you had a boy you sent valentines to, and blushed whenever he spoke to you…but…that part of me didn't grow up, I guess. Hikari twisted around in her seat discretely and caught his eye. A small, affectionate smile conveyed the things she couldn't possibly put into words.

I always thought you'd offer your crush a hand-picked flower myself, Touji. She grinned as he looked very self-conscious.

Well, you were right. I almost gave my secret crush a flower once, but I decided she didn't really like me back, even though Shinji seemed to be certain the girl adored me. When Hikari got the message, a small frown took over her lips and jealousy flooded her veins. No one else should deserve such attention from Touji!

You were right about me too. When we had to make the whole class valentines, I'd make a special one for him. And—I collected anything of his that didn't matter, for awhile. I still have some bits and pieces from old obsessions!

Kensuke was always one to collect. We'd go home after school and he'd have me record him speaking about what had happened and holding the pencil or whatever delicately! They grinned simultaneously.

Asuka has always been a go-getter. She'd tell the guy pretty quickly that he liked her. I think it scared most of them off! Asuka'd tell me about how a boy had politely told her he didn't like her like she liked him. It really discouraged me—she's been so kirei forever but she never really dated! **(Kirei equals pretty!)**

But she's dating Shinji now. Shinji was a real blusher! He was really afraid of girls, it seemed!

The bell for lunch rang and covered up her giggle. She swiftly saved their conversation before grabbing the lunches she had made them both. Touji walked up to her with a friendly smile. Hikari beamed back up at him, and they set off for the back of the school.

She distinctly heard Kensuke scramble to tape them.

_**...Fades out to black...Fades in... **_

"Who was it that you had a crush on?" Hikari asked after the last bite of her rice ball. Touji chewed for a minute on the remains of the meal she had made for him. 

"…The only girl I feel comfortable telling you about would be Arashira Kayo." He told her. Hikari fought a frown.

"Go on?"

"Well, I was so nervous around her—Kayo-chan had a really cute smile, I remember. I was tongue-tied around her, and it was even harder to choose words if she smiled at me. I tripped over my own feet in front of her a lot, too." He colored with embarrassment. Hikari remembered the seven year old Touji, stuttering as Arashira flashed a big white smile at him, and practically falling when he tried to shift his weight. Hikari laughed jovially. He glared calmly at her.

"I remember how Kensuke would whisper to me as we watched that you wanted to marry her and I always hit him!"

Touji grinned. "Who was one person you really liked?"

"Masaharu Tachi." She frowned. "I thought he was god's gift to mankind. I imagine I was unbearable—hanging off his every word and blushing if he actually spoke to me. And when people said anything bad about him I'd whack them!" Hikari gave Touji a small smile. "I hated it when he got a crush. I'd notice him staring and I'd glare at whichever girl it was. I was so envious of anyone who got his attention. He mostly pretended I didn't exist! I'm glad he moved at the end of the year. I was really sad then, but…eh." She shrugged.

"I never liked that kid! He was a real snob. I resented him for being so rude to you. And I hated how he'd lead a girl on for awhile before selecting another!" Touji fumed.

Hikari smiled delightedly that he had such a reaction. She couldn't read into things too much—last time she had, she was certain she'd been wrong— but… "He was a terrible person." They nodded.

A minute later, Touji spoke quietly. "I never liked it when you had a crush. It wasn't obvious when we grew up a bit, but when we were little I'd hate the boy's guts for some unrelated reason. Like…he didn't hold the door open for someone or something like that."

She blushed. "I-I never liked the girls you had crushes on, either. Even if I had liked her before I noticed you paying her the ultimate attention. I was jealous—that you didn't pay as much attention to me. It felt like you were bored of spending time with me and wanted to be friends with someone else instead." She bit her lip and tilted her head up at him.

Touji looked stunned at her confession and reddened. "I kind of felt jealous too, but it was because you never were treated like I thought you deserved." Hikari blushed. A moment later though, she frowned.

"How is that jealousy?" her voice could be described as careless, but her tone was decidedly confused. Touji avoided her eyes for a moment, but eventually turned them back on her. She wondered exactly what shade of brown they were. She always made comparisons to the dark russet sea glass her father had collected as a child.

"I-I felt that I could have done a better job than those useless jerks. I was jealous that you—you gave them all these opportunities which they wasted, and… I wasn't given a chance to prove myself to you. I've…" he trailed off at the end, but Hikari knew that she would have dreams tonight in which he confessed his everlasting love instead of quieting. She flushed happily, and dimly wondered if either of them could be any redder.

"That's—that's a really considerate thing to say, Touji-kun." She whispered. Whispering just seemed so appropriate for the moment.

And they stared at each other unintentionally for a minute. Then the bell rang.

_Dratted bell! _Hikari whined as Touji got up._ It always seems to stop our conversations!_

They returned to the classroom, minds swarming with what had just passed.

**(I do not know for certain how old Mari Suzuhara is. I'm guessing nine—third grade—so if you are a Mari-chan aficionado, please don't be offended!)**

Kensuke was currently listing the physical attributes of some battleship he had researched during free time to Touji. She could feel Touji's eyes on her, and a quick glance told her he was staring at her shoulder, of all things. But Hikari was much too distracted by the couple nearby to care, or to pretend she was paying attention to Kensuke. Asuka and Shinji were smiling at each other over on a short wall not unlike the one the girls had sat on earlier. Asuka said something to Shinji, who tentatively took her hands in his. Hikari sighed.

She truly was happy for her friend. Very happy! But she was overwhelmed by jealousy. How come Asuka—who hadn't even know she liked Shinji until Hikari had told her—could so quickly become his girlfriend? It was unbelievable. Was Asuka-chan some sort of super-human? Or was it just that Shinji's so obvious that once she saw the bait she grabbed it?

"So now I'm going to make a 3-D model of it. It'll keep me busy until late tonight, so you'll have to find someone else to go home with you." Kensuke told Touji, with a suggestive nudge. Touji pushed him.

Hikari frowned. "Make sure you have time to do your homework, Kensuke." She said sternly.

"Hai hai, Class Rep!" Kensuke straightened up and saluted her. Hikari fought a smile. "See you two tomorrow!" he gave a small wave before hurrying off to hide behind a tree. Hikari guessed that Kensuke didn't know she could tell where he was hiding, taping them and the couple nearby like always. Touji, who should be able to realize that sort of thing by now, was completely unaware of their watcher.

Hikari suddenly felt shy, for no real reason. Touji was adjusting the straps on his backpack. She shifted her weight slowly from foot to foot, and when she looked back at Touji, he was smiling at her affectionately. She gave him a tentative smile back.

"So…was Kensuke going to go home with you today?" she asked stupidly, for lack of something better to say.

"Yeah. Mari wanted us to help her with a project this afternoon." He hung his head. "I don't know if Kensuke is afraid of a third grade level project…or really did find that ship during free period like he claims." Hikari giggled. They were quiet for a moment, and Hikari remembered that she had been watching the new couple. She turned to look at them and Touji followed her eyes.

Shinji had said something to Asuka, and she gave him an impressive kiss. Hikari blushed and turned back to Touji. She wasn't too surprised to find that he, too, had colored. Touji wouldn't meet her eyes.

"Wha-what's the project on?" Hikari asked. Touji finally stopped staring at the sky to look down at her.

"She's supposed to write a story or something. She was really frantic when she mentioned it this morning. I think it's due tomorrow." He frowned. "Silly Mari-chan; should've done it earlier!"

"You're one to speak! If I didn't remind you about upcoming assignments and such, you'd never do anything!" She chided.

"Mmph." Touji muttered. "Well…would you—would you mind coming to my house—to help Mari-chan?" He asked in a nervous voice.

She bestowed upon him a delighted smile. "Nothing would make me happier! I haven't seen Mari in quite a while!"

Touji himself looked like nothing could make** him** happier. "Let's go, then." He started walking. When Hikari didn't immediately follow him, he looked over his shoulder at her.

Hikari had turned to glance at Asuka and Shinji. _Oh, it must be so nice! Not a confession, maybe, but to be trusted friends forever…_ Hikari smiled. At that moment, Touji hesitantly reached for her shoulder. She turned around and felt the concern in his gaze. _But geez! To be no more than friends…I don't want that!_

She shook her head and started walking to his house. Touji's arm brushed against hers teasingly the whole way there.


	2. Family

**NOTE: **Thank you to knoop, bigguy1234, Neferius, Senorita Rage, WebKnight, AND marduk-report!

Marduk-report, I'm sorry, can you explain what you meant about the IM stuff in your next review? I was confused a little and I want to fix any problems!

**CHAPTER 2:**

**"Hikari-chan's the mother and Touji-kun's the father and I'm the perfect child!"**

**  
**

"Mari-chan! Guess who's here to help you with your project!" Touji called into the quaint Suzuhara house. Mari came rushing down from her room at her older brother's voice.

"Touji-kun!" She yelled on the way down, hurrying to hug him. "I'm so glad you remembered!"

A blur of dark hair hurtled into Touji and he grunted, but hugged his sister back. Hikari smiled fondly at the siblings. _Touji will probably make the best father someday! _She thought unwisely, and blushed lightly.

Touji parted from the nine year old to motion at his companion. "Hikari-chan is going to work on the project with us!" he told her. Mari looked incredibly excited, and hugged Hikari too.

"Good afternoon, Mari-hime!" Hikari greeted the girl. She giggled at the nickname and took both of their hands to drag them to the dining table. (Mari-himePrincess Mari)

Hikari and Touji didn't go over each other's house very often, instead meeting at the park or somewhere else. She was always delighted in seeing Touji at his most comfortable; relaxing on the couch or searching through the fridge.

The dining room was naturally lit by the soft light of the sun. The rectangular table with a centerpiece Touji had made when he was in kindergarten was set to work at. Papers were neatly organized on its surface.

Mari sat down and looked at Touji expectantly. Mari tried not to grin when Touji pulled out a chair for Hikari. Hikari personally was trying to stop herself from turning pink, and sat down in the proffered chair. Touji sat down and scooted right up behind her. He was leaning over her shoulder. Hikari valiantly attempted to stop herself from shuddering by pulling out her laptop.

"So, what's this story supposed to be on?" Touji inquired while Hikari booted up the computer.

"It's a made up—fantasy—story. We get to pick one of these," She took out a list and showed it to them. "to be the main character, and use one of the problems on the sheet, too."

Touji had pressed himself against her back to see the list, but Hikari tried to concentrate on the words rather than the warm tingles spreading through her body.

The list included main characters such as a dragon, prince, queen, witch, fairy, wizard, and a servant in a magical household. Mari chan had circled in bright purple ink 'queen' and underlined 'dragon'.

"What sort of problem do you want this queen to have?" Touji asked. Hikari could barely breathe. Each word he spoke reverberated in her ear and she could feel him breathing on her collarbone. Some of his hair was tickling her cheek pleasantly. She held in a sigh.

"I'm thinking that a dragon wrecking her kingdom would be cool!" Mari-chan said enthusiastically.

When Touji nodded, his cheek briefly brushed against Hikari's. It was at that moment that Hikari was certain she would definitely be unable to fall asleep tonight. And was she ever right.

**FADE OUT TO BLACK…FADE IN…**

"Thank you for helping Mari-chan write the story." Touji said quietly when Mari had left to put the papers in her bag. Hikari blushed in embarrassment.

"I love helping." she murmured to him. He had finally leaned back in his seat and she turned to face him. Touji's face was the epitome of relaxation—his eyes were drooping charmingly and a small smile rested on his lips.

Touji straightened up a bit. "So, since you love helping, you wouldn't mind assisting me in cooking dinner?" he asked hopefully. Hikari blushed.

"I wouldn't mind one bit." She responded. Touji beamed at her. "But can I call my Papa first?"

"Of course!" He pointed to a phone. "…My father doesn't come home until about an hour or two after supper a few times a week so I have to cook or order dinner these days." He told her with a sigh. "I'm such a bad cook that we usually order. It'll be nice to have a real meal." They smiled.

Hikari called her father and explained to him what she was doing. He had seemed nervous when he learned that the friend was a boy.

"Hikari-chan, who else is in the house?" he had asked anxiously.

"His little sister, Mari-chan. His father is working late tonight." She heard a sudden intake of breath on the other line. "Oh, please, Papa? If it were Asuka you'd let me!" She whispered heatedly.

"But this is that Touji boy you're always on about?"

She blushed. "Yes. You know you can trust me, though, right?"

A pause. "…Yes. I trust you. Have fun—but not too much!" he ordered.

Hikari was embarrassed when she came to terms with just what her father had been nervous about. Touji's father was out…and Mari would go to bed not so long after dinner. They would have a lot of time on their hands to do what teenagers do best. Hikari shuddered. Better not to continue that thought, or she'd never sleep again.

Touji and Mari were ecstatic that Hikari could stay, which swelled Hikari's heart so much that she tried to make the best meal possible with the limited ingredients in the Suzuhara kitchen.

Touji was adamant about helping her, so she set him to tasks like cutting the vegetables for the stir fry. Touji ran through the bean sprouts with the knife surprisingly fast, and Hikari feared for his fingers.

She rummaged through the cupboard for special seasonings, and picked the ones that she thought would go best together. The meal was a fairly quick thing to make, but she was certain that it would be delicious. Mari-chan had hung around watching them for a few minutes, until Hikari asked her to make the rice balls. Mari had been overjoyed to join the older kids in their task.

"It feels like a real family right now!" Mari had exclaimed, startling both Hikari and Touji so much that they almost injured themselves on their tools. "Hikari-chan's the mother and Touji-kun's the father and I'm the perfect child!"

They had blushed furiously at that, which made Mari giggle madly, and refused to meet each others eyes for rather some time.

**FADE TO BLACK…FADE IN…**

Once the meal was ready to be served, Touji grabbed four plates and three sets of utensils. "One for Dad." He explained when Hikari eyed the last plate uncertainly.

"You're lucky I always cook for four. You wouldn't have lunch everyday, first of all." She said importantly. He grinned and moved one plate forward so that she could dish the food onto it, leaning calmly against the counter.

"Not so much, this one's for Mari." He said. Hikari's heart melted and she wanted right then and there to tell Touji that she thought he was the most compassionate boy to ever live. Instead, she settled for sending him a light, affectionate smile, which he seemed proud to have received. _It's so undeniable—Touji's compassion is what draws me to him. Hikari thought. I wonder what I have that could draw him to me? She smiled in her thoughts. There was that time the other night when he came running to me when I screamed... "Did you see how Touji came running when you screamed? Maybe his body was aching for you!" Asuka had said._

Much like her brother had done not so long ago, Mari barreled into the room when Touji called her. She brought the plates out to the table when asked. Mari had set it up so that Hikari was next to her and Touji across from Hikari. They all sat down to eat with excited expressions.

Hikari was marveling at how this seemed like a date. Mari was thrilled to have the famous Hikari-chan cook for them (for Touji-kun had told her many times how wonderful Hikari's meals were). Touji was considering what his sister had said earlier about them being like a family and felt warm inside. They each took a bite.

The meal was very tasty, as Mari-chan had squealed in delight. Touji moaned in a way that made Hikari want to kiss him VERY BADLY, but merely smiled at her creation for eliciting such a sound.

Touji leaned back in his chair and his foot nudged Hikari's gently. Her eyes widened fractionally but she continued to eat at a steady pace. Touji nudged her foot again. She looked up to see him grinning at her charmingly.

Hikari fought a grin herself and simply raised an eyebrow and continued to eat. Mari-chan was apparently unaware of the silent exchange going on, and ate her meal happily.

Touji didn't appear to like being ignored, so he played with her foot under the table while staring at her, trying to get her to look at him. Hikari was secretly elated but tried to act cool as best as she could.

Touji performed an difficult circle around her ankle. Hikari scooted forward in her chair as a response. Sleepy from all the excitement of the day, Mari excused herself and headed upstairs, to the calls of goodnight from the older two.

A minute later, she had just barely finished half the meal. Both of them were eating at a snail's pace. Hikari was trying to be very slow so she could spend more time here with Touji.

His foot had been fooling around with her immobile one for quite some time before she slowly rubbed his ankle with her own. Touji froze in surprise, but quickly returned the gesture. She finally looked up to meet his eyes.

Hikari felt heady and warm. She couldn't believe the passion in his gaze, how when his eyes locked with hers he seemed to swell with pride. He too scooted closer to the table and ran his foot up the back of her calf. She shivered lightly, hoping the moment would never end.

They continued playing footsie, a game neither of them had quite appreciated before this point, until both of their plates were almost completely clean and they no longer had an excuse to sit at the table.

An hour or two had passed, and Hikari felt that she should be getting home soon. Touji had shaken his head when she mentioned this.

"I'm not allowing you to go walking around at this time of night alone. You'll have to wait for Dad to get here so I won't be leaving Mari-chan by herself when I walk you home." He said sternly. Hikari blushed with pride in her fondness of Touji—the boy truly was more compassionate than anyone she'd ever met!

They sat on the comfortable and welcoming couch for half an hour watching a made for TV movie. It was one she had seen already, and wondered if they'd make it to the romantic part of the film. She wasn't sure whether she wanted to or not, feeling that she would have to be sick from school tomorrow so she could have enough time to think about everything if she did.

But she was saved from one embarrassment by another.

**FADE TO BLACK…SCREEN LIGHTS UP IMMEDIATELY…**

Mr. Suzuhara, Hikari knew, was a courteous man with an obsession for work. Though he wasn't with his children very often, the time he did get was treasured. Touji never had anything bad to say about his father, besides his long hours.

And because she knew Touji had to get his thoughtfulness from someone, she should have expected it when Mr. Suzuhara tiptoed into the living room, trying to be quiet so not to wake Mari.

Hikari and Touji were sitting close on the couch, with a worn maroon blanket draped across their laps. Touji's father crept in with his coat over his arm, and promptly dropped it upon seeing his son in what appeared to be a very tender moment. "Touji!" He said breathlessly, sounding pleased and pained simultaneously. **( A/N: HA! Just to let you know, Suzuhara-san is pleased 'cause he thinks his son has a girlfriend, but pained because Touji didn't say anything about dating someone!)**

All three of them flushed. Hikari thought that she could die right then and there for slowly moving closer to him and being caught. Touji stood up and held out a hand to help Hikari up. "Dad, you remember Hikari-chan, don't you? She came over to help me help Mari on a project."

Suzuhara-san smiled graciously at her, and then sent his son a quick, confused look.

"I stayed to help make dinner, too. Touji said I had to wait till you got home before I could go home." She explained hastily.

"So you could watch Mari-chan," Touji continued for her, smiling at his father. "I'm going to walk Hikari-chan home now."

Mr. Suzuhara nodded, pride shining in his eyes. "Good. It's too dark for her to walk home by herself. I'm going to go upstairs to check on Mari-chan now, but I need to have an important talk with you when you get back." He raised an eyebrow and his eyes flicked from Touji to Hikari, silently telling his son something Hikari could not understand. Touji blushed vividly, which confused her even more.

Suzuhara-san then turned to Hikari. "It was nice to see you again Hikari-chan after such a long time! You look so grown up!" He started towards the stairs, and then faced her again, as if he suddenly thought of something. "Thank you for bringing Touji lunch every day, and for making us a meal tonight!" he said before turning and sneaking up to his daughter's room. Hikari blushed.

Touji grabbed her arm and headed for the door. "Did you bring a coat?" he asked, eyes avoiding hers. When she shook her head, he pulled out one of his windbreakers for her to wear. She heated up before she even put it on. Touji then continued to act gentlemanly and carried her bag for her. Hikari sent him a blatantly adoring smile when he wasn't looking at her.

They stepped off the porch and started on towards her house.

**FADE TO BLACK…FADE IN TO NIGHT SKY…**

Their arms were brushing against each others loudly, the sound of jackets scraping against each other creating a muffled beat. Hikari's head was surprisingly calm.

She had always liked walking with Touji. It was so easy and comfortable and he always stood close to her. It made her…long to hold his hand, to walk like a boyfriend and girlfriend would. The picture would be complete if he whispered sweet words in her ear.

However, the furthest she had gotten to achieving her fantasy was whispering to Touji.

"Touji-kun, aren't the stars bright tonight?" she had murmured. He simply nodded and smiled appreciatively at the night sky. It felt too much like a date to Hikari, even if it wasn't exactly like the things she imagined would eventually happen.

Touji smiled down at her when she wasn't looking, which would have pleased her if she had seen. When she did look up at him, he had already turned his face forward.

"I love the stars... they're so far away; _unattainable_." She said softly. "Nevertheless, I almost feel like I could reach up and grab one." She lifted her hand slowly upward, clasping it around empty air. Touji watched with a sad smile on his face.

"You always did strive for the best." He commented. Hikari felt like laughing. She **did** try for the most excellent in everything. _It doesn't matter whether I want good grades, a good meal…or a good boyfriend… I'm always trying for top,_ she thought with a smile. "And you're so stubborn that I know you'll get what you want from life." He continued. Hikari slowed to a stop.

"You think I could reach it?" she asked with a tilt of her head.

He seemed concerned by her behavior, but told her truthfully: "I don't have a doubt that you will."

She smiled and a light blush spread over her face. They resumed walking.

**FADE OUT…**

**NOTE: I will be putting up "Other People's Thoughts, CTY" soon. Before I go on vacation this Thursday...So like today or tomorrow! Yahoo! **


	3. The Sex Talk

NOTE: What color do you think Hikari's eyes are? I've always thought they were brown. But recently, I was looking at one of the pictures from the anime, and I don't know how I didn't realize it earlier! Her eyes are, in fact, BLUE. Like, Shinji also has blue eyes and people seem to miss this fact (do any of the fanart people watch the anime anymore? Even in the opening credits you can see how blue his eyes are!)! Which is weird for me because the day before I found this out, I was recoloring a fanart of Hikari to look like me (I've got blue eyes and _chocolate_ locks) and so when I figured out that it was more accurate than everything else I had colored...MAN. So now I can't see her with blue eyes either or instead I just see myself! So, to remedy this, I went on photoshop to mix around some possible colors. I came out with dusky purple. Why, you ask? Well, brown and blue mixed about 40-60 respectively came out as a purple-ish color. And it looked really good too. THE POINT IS: if I ever find the need to comment on Hikari's eyes--which is doubtful, seeing as this is from her POV--I am going to call them purple and that is that. Also, I just wanted to tell you guys this news. :)

**CHAPTER 3:**

**"I can't imagine Gendo Ikari having the sex talk with Shinji!"**

Touji and Hikari stood on her doorstep staring across the welcome mat at each other.

"So...here's my house, then." Hikari said, rubbing her hands together to keep warm, having handed Touji back the windbreaker with his distinct smell that always reminded her of the comfort of her blankets on a cold night.

"Hai." Touji replied slowly. Hikari couldn't help but grin at how stupid they were both acting. _I'm so anxious! And all I have to do is say goodbye and open the door. _"See you tomorrow."

Hikari shivered. "You'll be fine walking home?"

"Of course!" Touji said with a frown. She stifled a giggle. _If I start laughing I won't be able to stop; that's how unnerved I am!_

"Great. Goodbye, I guess." She said. Touji's eyes darted from her to the windows and back.

"Bye. And thanks again for coming over."

Hikari nodded, and was about to turn around and open the door when Touji leaned down and kissed her cheek.

_OH! OH MY GOD! TOUJI **KISSED** ME!_ She was no longer chilly as an exciting warmth spread from the spot he had kissed to cover her body. Hikari's heart was racing and she felt giddy. This was what she had wanted forever—she had seen the moment played over and over in her dreams, had wished for it every single day! And yet her longing for him wasn't satisfied. If anything, she only wanted him with more passion than she had before!

Hikari glowed pink and moved her eyes up to his face, and was surprised to see him staring right down into her eyes, his own face lightly red. All she could think to do was smile radiantly up at him, and then enter her house.

She slumped quietly on the back of the door after shutting it with a click. She could hear her younger sister Nozomi faintly playing music on her keyboard upstairs.

But it was quite awhile before she heard Touji's slow footsteps as he left her doorstep, and much longer before Hikari's heart stopped beating so loudly.

Hikari had much difficulty doing her homework that night. She was terribly distracted, and every few minutes the scene replayed in her head and she trembled with joy. She stopped her homework late into the night, even though she wasn't finished, because she knew it was impractical to think she had gotten more than half the questions right anyway. Hikari decided it was too late to call Asuka and tell her the news. Instead, she quickly readied herself for bed.

A few minutes later she was curled up comfortably under her thick covers, not even expecting sleep to come. The small tremors from her immense happiness were sure to keep her from sleeping.

_It's so—wow. I'm not sure I ever expected **any** of my fantasies to come true! I thought I could only dream of it! But Touji was right. My unattainable dream was reached! And now we'll be even closer than before!_

_ButI'm certain Touji didn't mean it in a romantic way. He couldn't. It was his way of thanking me for helping Mari, and cooking dinner. It's not like he declared eternal love to me on my doorstep and asked my hand in marriage! Touji won't want to cuddle before school—in **public**— like some couples do. We're not even a couple anyway. I can't tell if we ever **will** be!_

_But there's no possible way I could go back now. Before maybe I'd get over him with **a lot** of time apart. But now—now I know what his lips feel like! **How** in the **world** would I be able to stop loving Touji? The very fibers of my being are **screaming** for him! _

Hikari's head was dancing in and out of despair and delight. She wasn't sure whether she should be all happy since he kissed her, or all sad as there was so much she still hadn't gained. It was undeniable that she was thrilled to have been kissed—her first kiss (though it was just her cheek) from the first person she truly loved. But Hikari was still miserable because she didn't think he loved her back.

Sure, Touji loved her as a friend. Even if they would never say it, for fear the other might interpret it differently than it was meant, and because of the randomness of the statement, they loved each others friendship dearly. Both had their days where they hated the other to some degree, for they did fight often, but there was always a portion of themselves that valued the bond they shared a great deal.

Yet, it could never satisfy Hikari's need. No matter how many times she assured herself that everything was fine as long as he loved her in some way, she would always long for more. She simply couldn't get enough of him! Touji was like a drug— intoxicating, bewildering, and chaos to her head, all rolled into one little bundle of forbidden devotion.

The rapid tango her mind was performing unexpectedly rocked her to a light slumber within an hour of frantic indecision.

When Hikari woke up the next morning, she had hardly noticeable bags under her eyes and the hair of a feral animal. The broken sleep she had achieved wasn't very restful, and she sluggishly prepared to face a long day at school.

Dressed in the blue school uniform and hair calmed into her trademark pigtails, Hikari set off for the school. She was carrying her books and the quickly assembled lunch she had prepared upon arriving home, surely unappetizing thanks to her preoccupation at the time. She hoped that Touji wouldn't assume that she was trying to punish him for the kiss by serving him terrible food. Hikari clung onto the small chance that her culinary skills would shine through the haste with which she made the dish.

When Hikari arrived at the school, she spotted all of her friends already talking happily with each other. Her eyes immediately swung to Touji. He looked as if he had also gotten little sleep, but instead of looking half dead, he seemed to glow in her eyes. It was probably because she loved him so much.

Hikari slowly walked over to the group. Asuka was clutching blissfully onto Shinji's arm. The latter was trying to fight a smile as Kensuke pointed his camera all over the place. Kensuke was the first to notice her walking up to them, and taped her curiously. Hikari was usually early and energized, yet today she was lagging in both categories.

"Yo, Hikari!" Kensuke called with a wave of his arm to get her attention, as if she hadn't noticed him already. She gave him a brief smile in return and a yawn for the camera.

Touji had turned red when he saw her. Hikari was positive it had something to do with the 'important talk' Mr. Suzuhara had with his son when he came home. Neither could meet the other's eyes from embarrassment.

Asuka gasped dramatically when she caught sight of her friend. "Hikari, why do you have bags under your eyes? Did you sleep at all!?" Asuka exclaimed. Hikari cursed her attention to detail.

"Mmmm. I slept really lightly last night, so I'm still tired." She grumbled. "This is going to be a really bad day!" She sighed. "I didn't even finish all my homework!"

The group was alarmed. Hikari Horaki, Class Representative, didn't finish her homework? The star academic? Asuka's eyes flashed with concern, but before she could speak, Kensuke broke the silence. "And you were telling **me** yesterday to make sure I had time to finish my homework?" He asked. "What, did you and Touji have such a rousing good time that it prevented you from doing your work?"

Hikari and Touji blushed. Asuka and Shinji looked downright bewildered. "What were you doing yesterday?" Shinji asked uncertainly.

Touji quickly answered. "N-nothing! Hikari was just helping Mari with a project at my house!"

Kensuke nudged Shinji and whispered loudly "She stayed over for dinner, too. They had a _date_!"

Asuka looked shocked. "Hikari?"

Hikari and Touji blushed heavily. "It's not like that!" they yelled simultaneously. Kensuke, who had been taping them gleefully zoomed in for a close-up on their expressions, and was pleased to find a flash of guilt in their eyes.

She was certain that being interrogated by Kensuke wouldn't be very enjoyable, so Hikari sighed and dragged Asuka over to the safety of a tree to explain. Meanwhile, Touji was unluckily stuck answering his friends' questions.

"So." Asuka began. "You were in bed but not sleeping last night. But since Touji arrived before you, that rules out the suggestion that you slept toge—"

Hikari cut her off with a screech. "ASUKA!!! How could you SUGGEST something like that!?"

Asuka laughed good-naturedly. "Kensuke's rubbing off on me. But seriously you were over his house?"

She blushed lightly and nodded. "After Kensuke made an excuse so he couldn't help Touji, I went home with him to help his little sister." She explained everything that happened up until his father came home—in great detail, too.

Her friend had hearts in her eyes. Hikari was amazed at how much more generally happy Asuka was now that she was dating Shinji, and wished she could have happiness like that. Asuka and Shinji already seemed to be in couple's bliss. Hikari couldn't help but be jealous.

"It was kind of embarrassing when Suzuhara-san walked in on us. I think he thought we were dating or something and Touji hadn't told him. And I think when Touji got home, his father had the sex talk with him." She said quickly. Asuka started giggling.

"Oooh! Well, at least he'll be prepared when you two finally get together! I can't imagine Gendo Ikari having the sex talk with Shinji!" She laughed heartily, but Hikari had a look of disgust on her face.

"We haven't really done anything, how can you think that such a conversation would benefit either of us just yet!?"

Asuka just giggled in response, and motioned for her to continue the story. "So, he walked you home?"

Hikari got a far away look to her eyes. "Hai. It was wonderful! He even let me wear one of his jackets so I wouldn't get cold!" She looked over to the boys then, noting that Shinji and Kensuke were teasing their friend and every so often they would all look at her. When they realized she was looking at them they all colored and spun back to face the other way.

"Well?" Asuka asked after the minute of silence. Hikari was just about to finish with the kiss, when the bell rang loudly, telling them to hurry inside. She hastily told her they'd talk during lunch, and rushed into the building.

Hikari's abilities as Class Rep were horribly affected by her sleep loss. It was like the first day on the job again—she was making mistakes and feeling stupid once more. It was embarrassing to her reputation as a loud, academics-obsessed, angry girl that her voice was much softer and her movements sluggish. Asuka sent her a message saying how it was like watching a subdued version of her, as if she had been a wild animal before.

Hikari faced even more embarrassment later in the day when she had to tell Misato-sensei that she didn't finish her homework. The collective shock and dramatic gasps were almost more than she could stand, and the confused look the teacher sent her was like something from a nightmare. She fought hard not to sink into her seat.

It was the free period before lunch, and once again she was sending messages to Asuka. It's something AMAZING, that's all I can say for now. Hikari typed in response to her friend's last message, begging her to say what happened next.

AMAZING? How can you say something like that!? Now I'm all excited and I can't wait! Why won't you tell me now?

You'd scream again like you did last Friday and Misato-sensei will attack you.

Asuka giggled. So it's really shocking then? I suppose I can hold off, then. But what will you tell dearest Touji-kun when you don't eat lunch with him?

Hikari considered this for a moment, before turning around surreptitiously and making a face at Asuka. I'll hand him his lunch and say that I'm eating with you!

Asuka stifled a giggle. No, you goof! Is there the possibility that he'll find it suspicious? Will he know we're talking about him?

Hikari felt suddenly nervous. Would he think she was angry at him for kissing her? She turned to look at him, only to find that he was staring right at her, apparently hoping she would feel his eyes on her and look at him. He started typing something on the laptop, and glanced up at her all the while. She wasn't surprised to see the message pop up on the screen, but was slightly alarmed at how similar this experience was to yesterdays.

Are you mad at me? He said, almost exactly the same question as the day before. She was confused.

Mad at you for what? She heard him sigh raggedly.

Are you talking to him right now!? Asuka sent. Hikari turned and nodded quickly. Asuka grinned. I'll leave you two alone, then!

Touji's message appeared. You were stuck at my house until pretty late. You weren't able to finish your homework or sleep because of me!

Hikari blushed faintly. No, that wasn't a big problem. I was just really distracted and that messed me up. She typed, hoping it would reassure him that she wasn't mad at him.

Really? Because I'd understand if you were mad at me.

She twisted around, an adoring smile on her face. I couldn't be angry at you, Touji! Not when you acted so gentlemanly!

He was confused. How was I acting gentlemanly?

She fought a pleased sigh at the memories. You walked me home; you wouldn't let me go alone, and you lent me a jacket. And you Hikari paused before sending, unsure of what she could say. She surely couldn't say 'and you kissed me goodnight'! And you thanked me so many times! She completed the message and pressed enter.

She thought he must have had that small smile on his face; the one that she had seen in the dream with the light wind and the park and all their children running around them. Hikari had been scared out of her mind when she had **that** dream. She hadn't even realized just how much she liked Touji yet! She didn't understand that she liked him much more than a friend for _months_ after that.

I'm glad then, I suppose.

Good! She smiled. Oh, I hope you don't mind, but I'm eating lunch with Asuka today.

There was a long pause. Alright.

She was concerned. Is it really okay? I mean, I thought it would be good so that Kensuke gets to see his friends. And I really want to know more relationship-stuff from Asuka.

The reply was quicker this time. Oh, no, it's fine with me. But, ah You did bring lunch for me, right? I'm sorry for being rude, but?

She giggled softly. Hai! But you'll probably be disappointed! I wasn't 'all there' when I made it.

Ha! Hikari, you're so ridiculous! Any food YOU make will turn out wonderful, doubtless!

Hikari blushed vividly. You always know just what to say, Touji! She flirted unconsciously. It was something Asuka had pointed out to her thousands of times. Supposedly, Hikari would flirt like mad with Touji, who, as Asuka told it, noticed and flirted madly back. She wasn't sure if she believed any of it, but it certainly was possible. However, whether she thought it was true or not, Hikari hadn't noticed the playful way they were speaking.

Only because you make it so easy! It's almost like you were fishing for compliments!

She gasped quietly, but dramatically nonetheless. Ooh, Touji-kun! She sent, amused. You found me out!

She looked over her shoulder and beamed at him, trying not to be too obvious. Ahh! My goal has been achieved! Now I can die happy!

She grinned wildly. The bell rang loudly, shocking her, even though she was no longer in a drowsy state. She saved the conversation as she did with every conversation she ever had on the messenger in school. She picked up both their lunches, still smiling, and turned around—right into Touji.

He had come up to her desk during the rampage to get outside, and stood very closely behind her, so when she had twirled around cheerfully she was almost right up against him. Their position left Hikari so surprised that she didn't even blush.

Touji had been smiling when she first turned, but now the smile slowly faded out into an expression Hikari couldn't name. He opened his mouth as if to say something, but didn't. Hikari stared up at him with an odd apprehension clouding her mind.

"Hai?" she whispered. The sound of her voice startled Touji out of his trance, and he took a quick step backwards.

He stumbled over words. "I—Gomen, I...uh, can I have my lunch?" he asked. She dumbly handed it to him, and he took off, almost tripping on his way out the door.

Unaware of the other presence in the room that had witnessed the entire scene, Hikari sat on the desk and put her hand over her heart, staring at the doorway.

"...Hikari?" The person said, shocking Hikari so much that she fell off the desk with a loud thump and a shrill yelp. "Hikari, are you OK!?"

_It's only Asuka,_ Hikari thought with relief. _I was afraid it was Misato-sensei!_ "Me?" she responded, getting up with the help of her friend. "I'll be fine!"

Asuka shook her head. "Hikari, that was sure crazy!"

"What was crazy?" Hikari asked cautiously. Asuka grinned.

"You two have such chemistry! It's so insane that you guys didn't jump each other or something right then!" Asuka exclaimed gleefully.

Hikari blushed. "What are you talking about? He just ran away from me!" She hung her head. "What did I do wrong?"

Asuka patted her back and started leading her outside. "I don't know why he ran away. But trust me, it wasn't anything YOU did."


	4. Imp note to my READERS

Hey! This is an author's note which is against the rules but please nobody report me since this is **super important**!

Alright, I'll get straight to the point. I know I haven't updated this in a long time, but I have _manymanymany _more chapters to it on my computer. Now that my computer is hooked up to the internet, I **_could_ **post up all those chapters. But the problem is, I REALLY don''t like how I wrote this stuff. I've been re-reading all 18 total chapters that I've written so far, and I am **just not happy** with the character development or storyline anymore!

So, I was considering re-writing the whole story. There were a lot of good ideas in Closer to You, and I know there -_aren't_- a lot of **Touji x Hikari** stories out there. I want to go back to the very beginning, and maybe switch it from being a _continuation _of Pushing the Limits of our Friendship to a _standalone_ story. I want to show my improvement as a writer and prove I can keep in character!

Now here's the really important part: Do you want me to start writing the new one right away, or should I just post all the other chapters I wrote for CtY up first? **PLEASE REVIEW THIS NOTE** and let me know what you think about the whole idea! And I hope that everyone who has reviewed and/or read this story before will enjoy the revised/new version when I write it!** Thank you!!!**

**Kenzie493**


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